Alternate Version Blogfest Entry

I'm going to share my blogfest entry in a minute, but first I want to explain this photo. As usual, I was up and at my computer around 5:45 this morning. My daughter woke early, even though it's Spring Break, but I didn't realize she was up. When I came down from my office for a bathroom break, this is what I found. Sidney had transformed the hall bathroom into a crime scene. It's the first, I'm sure, of many April Fool's gags to come today.

Actually, this pic is a perfect illustration for today's post, since a crime has definitely been committed in this blog entry. The following exercise was prepared for Livia Blackburne's Alternate Version Blogfest. We were challenged to take a scene from our story and re-write it in another style.

Writing in other genres, or different styles, is hard for me! The grooves in my author's fingerprints run deep. But, in the spirit of trying something new and stretching the old writing muscles, here it goes.

This excerpt is taken from a short story called When Opposites Attract. I was already way outside my comfort zone when I wrote the story, which was penned for a contest that only accepted Speculative Fiction. Below is the original snippet, and then a new version written with the flare of drama/chick lit romance. (Although, even I don't think: (A)That's actually a real genre; and (B)that I hit my mark. :P)


Original Version

Marla caught up to him and matched his long stride. “No shit, Robb. But that’s not the point. The Federation did take over and you no longer have clearance to be here. Disobeying the Federation is an act of treason. If you’re caught…”

He spun on her, grabbing her arm in a vice-like grip. “Now why would I get caught?”

His tone was dangerous, threatening. How far before a stretched rubber band breaks? He’d already come close to the edge of reason with Marla recently, when he’d walked in on her and Steve. That day, he’d understood how people can snap, grab a weapon and take out a few well-deserving people. In the dark days that'd followed, he’d fantasized about tying Marla up, torturing her until she hurt as much as he did. He’d been pathetic, twisted by tormented emotions, but he’d gotten a grip on himself. He'd resolved to be content on hurting her in small ways every chance he got, with spiteful words and defamatory rumors, little pressure valve acts to release his emotional tension and avoid a massive explosion. But the pain was still fresh. God help her if she pushed him now.

Marla was the one to break his gaze. She looked away, hugging her files to her chest. He turned and marched on, though he was aware of her soft footfalls behind him.

Alternate Version

Marla caught up to him, the rapid-fire clacks of her stilettos echoing down the corridor. “Please, Robb! That’s not the point. You can’t be caught here; it’s too dangerous. You just can’t!”

He stopped and turned, his right eyebrow raised. “Now, why would I get caught, sweetheart?”

His voice oozed sarcasm. What did this pretty little thing know about Federation business? Not to say she wasn’t a bright woman, she was employed here, wasn’t she? His eyes drifted down from her face, settling on the rise of suntanned flesh peeking out of her low-cut blouse. Robb released a loud sigh, meeting Marla’s eyes again.

“I appreciate your concern, really I do. Hey, I have an idea,” he added brightly. “Why don’t I give you the keys to my Porche. You go on down and wait for me there, and when I’m finished here, I’ll buy you that drink we keep talking about.”

He noticed she didn’t blink her ice blue eyes. She’d turned down his advances twice already, but when you’re dealing with a goddess like Marla, it was worth another shot. His smile waned to a smirk in the vacuum of her silence. Time was wasting, but he gave her another ten seconds to decide.

Marla was the one to break his gaze. She looked away, hugging her files to her chest. He turned and marched on, though he was aware of the clickity-clack of her shoes behind him.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

If you're interested in reading someone's entry who did a fantastic job with this challenge, visit Jen Brubacher @ Scribo Ergo Sum I loved reading her snippets and thought she really captured each different genre's style (she did three!)

And I hope you check out the other participants' blogs today. Find the Mr. Linky list by clicking HERE.

Have a fab day!

The Long on Short Fiction

Yesterday at Falen Formulates Fiction, I learned the short story I entered in Sarah Ahiers's 100 Followers Contest won third place! I was thrilled -- thanks, Sarah!

I encourage anyone who has never written a short story to give it a try. Writing shorts is an excellent way to experiment with your craft. We grow as writers when we challenge ourselves, step outside our writing comfort zones. However, embarking on a lengthy project with a complicated plot and large cast of characters may overwhelm an author who's writing out of her box. A short only deals with one significant moment in time, so whether you've never written from the omniscient viewpoint, or you want to attempt speculative fiction, the short story format is the perfect platform to try it out.

In the "short" category, there are a few formats to choose from:

Flash Fiction

This is the shortest of the shorts. There's no definitive definition for flash fiction, but most agree a story under 1,000 words is flash. Despite its brevity, flash fiction still must have a clear beginning, strong middle, and definite end. It should include exposition, rising action, climax, falling action, and resolution. Otherwise it is not flash fiction, but rather a vignette or scene.

Read this excellent article to better understand Flash Fiction.

Short Story

A short story is said to be a story you can read in one sitting. Again, the length of this format is debated and often comes down to the submission guidelines of each contest, magazine, or anthology. The most adhered to definition of a modern short story is one which has no more than 20,000 words and no less than 1,000.

This detailed article explains how to write a short story.

[Update: Thanks to Lindsay Duncan @ Unicorn Ramblings for pointing out that there is another format nestled in here between short story and novella. The Novelette is a category of short fiction said to have a word count between 7,500 and 17,499 words (according to Wikipedia) However, the same article points out that "The terms novelette and novelettish can also be derogatory, suggesting fiction which is 'trite, feeble or sentimental'."

When I checked online dictionaries, I found in Free Online Dictionary that the first definition of a novelette is "an extended narrative or short story," while the second definition is "a novel that is regarded as being slight, trivial, or sentimental." (HERE) And on YourDictionary.com the single definition for novelette is "a short novel, sometimes, specif., one regarded as inferior in quality, banal, overly commercial, etc." (HERE) Thanks, Lindsay, for your comment that led to this research!]

Novella

A novella is a renegade literary form in that it characterizes both a short story and a novel. Like a short story, a novella has a somewhat concise plot. The time frame is generally compact, and the reader often knows little about what happened before or after the time period of the story. A novella also mimics a novel because the story is organized in chapter-like segments and enjoys the freedom to explore its characters and plot in greater depth than does a short story. It typically is said to have between 17,500 words and 40,000.

Examples of famous novellas include John Steinbeck’s Of Mice and Men, George Orwell’s Animal Farm, Truman Capote’s Breakfast at Tiffany’s and Ernest Hemingway’s The Old Man and the Sea.

Have you ever written a short story? What's your favorite platform for experimenting with your craft?

My Truth and an Excerpt to Prove It

Almost every lie I wrote yesterday held a grain of truth, but there was nothing false about the two that were true. Of course, I've written stories about the most harrowing of my life's adventures, so my Tuesday Teaser will follow, a snippet from that story. But first:

1. I earned my doctorate in Rhetorical Speaking from the State University of New York at Oswego. Nope. I earned a Bachelor's in Rhetorical Communications from that school.

2. We have seven pets: a Shitzu puppy named Sammy, a Himalayan Persian cat named Pumpkin, an African Gray parrot named C.J., two love birds called Happy and Mango, a Betta Fish called Mr. Odie, and a frog named Jeremiah that hatched from a tadpole we caught in the pond out back. False! We have a Betta named Mr. Odie, but the other pets ALL live with my sister.

3. A ten-foot-long shark swam right alongside me while I was looking for seashells in water up to my knees on the Florida coast. TRUE! I was beach combing on a six a.m. walk, and I thought it was a dolphin in the water. I couldn't believe I was that close to a dolphin and in my excitement, I waded further in and walked alongside it. When it didn't surface for air I became suspicious, but when it thrashed its head I was sure: it was a shark, trolling the shore for breakfast.

4. I trained for three months and won at the regional level (Southeastern U.S.) of the Fitness America Competition. No...but I did place third!

5. I was kidnapped at gunpoint by machine gun-toting rebels during an African civil war. 100% True. See excerpt below.

6. One summer, I juiced three cucumbers a day, and drinking the juice made my hair grow six inches in three and a half months. No way.

7. In 1991, I shook Madonna's hand on the red carpet when she arrived for the premier of Truth or Dare in Hollywood, CA. Untrue-ish. I was there, and Madonna stepped out of her limo fifteen feet in front of me. But I didn't shake her hand.

8. I speak four languages: English (duh), French, Spanish, and an African dialect called Sango. Nope, I only speak three languages. No hablo Espagnol.

I apologize in advance for only offering a short excerpt of the following. In the Face of Danger, which tells the story of my abduction by rebel soldiers during the 1996 mutant army uprising in the Central African Republic, is currently submitted to The New Millennium Awards contest in the category of Creative Non-Fiction. For this reason, I can't publish it on the web. And, for the same reason, this excerpt will only be up for one day.

Here's the set-up: I was a Peace Corps volunteer with only a few months of service left before finishing my two year, three month tour of duty. My husband Christian, who was then my fiancé, and I met there. At the time of this story, he was living ten kilometers away on his company's construction base. When the war broke out, the Peace Corp issued a country-wide evacuation, and we were to follow the Emergency Evacuation Plan implicitly. This included volunteers in the region locking ourselves in the predesignated "Safe House" and awaiting further instructions. We were not to leave under any circumstances. I did. Here's what happened:

Excerpt From: In the Face of Danger
by Nicole Ducleroir

[Removed]

...pants on fire!

The lovely and hilarious Talli Roland passed the Soul Mate Award to me. Talli's blog voice is upbeat and her topics always blend writing with truths and oddities from the real world. Check out this perfect example from over the weekend!

The rules:
1. Choose five followers/commenters that 'get' you.
2. Write something fake (preferably not too mean) about them.
3. Link to them, and link back to the award's originating post to comment your receipt of the award.

Today, the Soul Mate Award goes to:

Abby Annis, whose loving husband commissioned a statue in her likeness for a first wedding anniversary present that Abby proudly displays on the front lawn.

Sarah Jayne @ Writing in the Wilderness, who was kicked out of a prestigious mime school in Paris when she kept saying vroom-vroom every time she mimed driving a car.

Laurel @ Laurel's Leaves, who was once chosen from the audience to assist a hypnotist and now hiccups every time the doorbell rings.

Mary Campbell @ Writer's Butt Does Not Apply, who somehow mixed up the seed packets last spring and ended up with a row of Cosmos in the vegetable garden and unsightly stalks of sweet corn lining her front porch.

Kimberly Franklin, who holds the handstand record in the state of Texas -- she broke the record after walking around on her hands for one week, one day, and seven hours. The first thing she did after acknowledging her supporters was go to the bathroom.

Thank you to Amanda @ So Many Story Ideas for the Creative Liar Award! Amanda's a creative woman with interesting things to say, and her blog is gorgeous! I hope you visit her today :)

The rules to this fun award are to write six fabulous lies about myself and two truths. You have to guess which ones are true! I have been terrible at guessing other people's truths; let's see how hard it'll be for you to guess mine (*smile*)

1. I earned my doctorate in Rhetorical Speaking from the State University of New York at Oswego.

2. We have seven pets: a Shitzu puppy named Sammy, a Himalayan Persian cat named Pumpkin, an African Gray parrot named C.J., two love birds called Happy and Mango, a Betta Fish called Mr. Odie, and a frog named Jeremiah that hatched from a tadpole we caught in the pond out back.

3. A ten-foot-long shark swam right alongside me while I was looking for seashells in water up to my knees on the Florida coast.

4. I trained for three months and won at the regional level (Southeastern U.S.) of the Fitness America Competition.

5. I was kidnapped at gunpoint by machine gun-toting rebels during an African civil war.

6. One summer, I juiced three cucumbers a day, and drinking the juice made my hair grow six inches in three and a half months.

7. In 1991, I shook Madonna's hand on the red carpet when she arrived for the premier of Truth or Dare in Hollywood, CA.

8. I speak four languages: English (duh), French, Spanish, and an African dialect called Sango.

I'm passing this award on to bloggers I'm excited to have met this week:

Justine Dell

Samantha @ Show and Tell

Gina @ Passions on Paper

Mel @ Ever Flowing Thoughts and Other Randomness

Jaydee @ Jaydee Morgan Blogs


So can you pick out the two truths from all those lies? I'll reveal my truths tomorrow. And while you're playing along, I hope you'll visit the bloggers' sites linked here.

Have a wonderful day!

A Week Full of Awards

Over the past week I've been offered some wonderful blog awards. It's so uplifting to feel the love from you awesome people! Here's what I've received and how I'd like to share it!

Thanks to my friends Talli Roland and Anne @ Piedmont Writer for this gorgeous award! I love the inscription that comes with this award: "By definition, a Prolific Blogger 'is one who is intellectually productive...keeping up an active blog that is filled with enjoyable content.'" Cool!

I'd like to pass this award on to some of my newest blogger friends:

Tawna Fenske @ Don't Pet Me, I'm Writing -- Tawna is wildly talented, represented and published, and her blog is on my daily must-read list. Love her voice, love her humor, LOVE her!

She Writes -- Her romance-style excerpts remind me of the times love has filled my heart with joy or pain, and her writing takes my breath away.

Michael @ Mental Masturbation -- Michael's sharp and creative mind makes for interesting blog posts each day, but his intuitive style lends beauty and rhythmic flow to everything he says.

Lisa Marie Miles @ Confessions of a Writing Mama -- Lisa reminds me of myself -- she blogs about big changes in her life (she moved this month) and still dives deeper into her craft (deciding to do Script Frenzy!) Help me cheer her on!!

Laura @ Through Laura's Eyes -- This talented lady is an amazing writer and blogger. Her engaging style pulls me into her writing every time.

Christi Goddard @ A Torch in the Tempest -- Christi is an artist and a writer, my favorite combination! Her blog is eye-candy and inspirational.

Alicia Frey @ Eyes 2 Page -- I enjoy Alicia's blog posts -- this writer is going places!

The lovely Niki @ Wool'n'Nuts passed The Silver Lining Award on to me. Niki's posts are wonderful, often about her love for animals and all nature's gifts. Her writing is wonderful too!

This award goes to more of my new blogging friends:

Kelly Gibian @ Just Write -- I love Kelly's blog voice! She's upbeat, and there's great energy in everything she says, especially when she's talking about her family and running.

Amanda Johnson @ Ramblings of a Wandering Mind -- Amanda has a young, fresh voice and she's making great progress on her WiP!

Charity Bradford @ My Writing Journey -- Charity reached 50 followers and is celebrating with a fun "food-themed" blogfest!

I want to thank Michael at Mental Masturbation for this wonderful award. Michael is one of the newer voices I've discovered in the blogosphere and love to listen to.

This award goes to more of my newest blogger friends:

Lindsay Duncan @ Unicorn Ramblings -- Lindsay's talent jumps off the screen, whether she's posting or commenting. I'm enjoying getting to know her!

Aubrie @ Flutey Words -- Aubrie is a sweetheart and her talent spans the music and writing worlds. I love reading what she has to say each day.

Anne Elle Altman @ All Write With Coffee -- Some blogs have incredible energy and this one does. The brand of energy that comes through Anne's writing is effortless and infectious.

Jen @ Unedited passed this award to me. Thanks, Jen! Her blog is teeming with creativity and she's loved by so many of us at Blogger. Visit her today!

I'm giving this award to three of my blogging BFFs:

Talli Roland -- This generous blog buddy is funny, smart, and makes me want to jump on a plane and cross the pond to hang out with her in person!

Lola @ Sharp Pen/Dull Sword -- Lola's posts make me laugh, think, and pull me into her world. Love this girl!

DL Hammon @ Cruising Altitude -- DL is one of my favorite bloggers. He's so centered in his writing, and his style is absolutely my cup of tea. When he's published, I'll be the first to buy his book.

My friend, DL Hammons @ Cruising Altitude awarded me this honor -- and this one really made me feel wonderful. Commenting on each other's blogs helps us stay connected on a personal level with other writers/bloggers. It's all about supporting each other and learning from one another.

Two friends who comment regularly on my blog, always leaving me with inspirational and encouraging words, and who are most deserving of this award are:

Anne @ Piedmont Writer -- Anne's become an inspiration and a sounding-board for project ideas, and I value her friendship and suggestions more than she probably knows!

Jemi Fraser @ Just Jemi -- Jemi has been a regular visitor and commenter since I met her, and I love her encouraging insights every time I see her beautiful white rose icon on my blog.

I hope you'll visit these creative bloggers' sites today. If you don't follow them, why not sign on? It's the number one best way to show your support of their talents and efforts -- and it just feels good to spread around the love!!

It's friends like the above mentioned, and YOU, that make my blogging experience perfect! Thank you!!

Have a fab weekend!

My Contest Entry

Today, I'm entering Sarah Ahier's Falen Formulates Fiction 100 Followers Writing Contest. If you want to play along, you'll need to write a short story under 750 words, following one of Sarah's prompts. It's all explained HERE to click -- hurry! Contest deadline is 5 pm CST today!

I chose this prompt to work with: A man discovers a large sum of money in his wallet and can't remember where it came from.

Here's my story:

The Sacred Heart

Thomas’ black leather coat was as useful as a window screen at protecting him from the biting wind. He clutched the collar to his throat and strode down the littered Bronx sidewalk with his head bent against the constant gust. Halfway down the block, a pair of tattered shoes entered his limited field of vision. Thomas slowed his pace and lifted his chin. His gaze traveled from the shoes, up soiled pant legs, past where the waist bent at ninety degrees, to the torso of a disheveled and unconscious man. Thomas took a step closer, peering at the man’s chest to see if it rose and fell. That’s when he spied the frayed wallet, half- wedged under the man’s hip next to a smudged Styrofoam coffee cup.

Thomas glanced quickly up and down the street, snatched up the wallet, and opened it. It was empty.

He tossed it back on the card board bedroll and walked on. A hundred feet later, he turned and crossed a small parking lot in front of Fortworth Saloon. He reached for the door handle and paused. A drop of water ran down the inside of the sweating glass. Thomas whipped his head left and right, popping his neck. He took a deep breath and pulled open the door.

~~~

“Are you freakin’ kiddin’ me?” Stevie Romero scoffed as he threw his cards face down. A cheer went up from the onlookers surrounding the table. Thomas raked all the chips from the ante pile toward him, including the Rolex laid neatly on top. The piles of chips at his side resembled the smokestacks of Jersey’s finest factories across the Hudson. Thomas allowed a boyish grin and avoided looking at the other players.

A large man in a white suit and matching ten bucket cowboy hat peered at Thomas. “So, Tommy Heart?” he drawled. “How come we’ve never seen y’all around the circuit before today? Y’all can’t be new to the game. Ain't beginners who can bluff like you.” He eyed Thomas’ chip fortress with suspicion.

“I been playin’ in the neighborhood for years. In Brooklyn, you gotta have your game face on all the time, ya know what I’m talkin’ about?” Thomas smirked and offered a knuckle bump to the cowboy who sat still, his emotionless eyes fixed on Thomas. Thomas lowered his fist.

“Aw, come on Tex, you’re just pissed off ‘cause he got your stupid watch,” shouted Romero from the other side of the table. “Your bluff was weak, man. Even I saw through it.”

As the Texan argued with Romero, Tommy Heart excused himself from the table. His cool composure cloaked his racing heart. In the vacant hallway leading to the restrooms, he pulled out his cell phone. Glancing left and right, he pushed speed dial number one.

“Sacred Heart of Brooklyn, may I assist you?”

“Sister Cecelia Maria?” he whispered into the phone.

“Father Thomas? Is that you? Where are you, we’ve been worried sick!”

“I’m fine, Sister. But I only have a minute to talk. Listen, please call the parish council and tell them to block the Youth Center demolition. I have raised the money for the new roof, and I suspect there’ll be enough to buy new furniture and get some of those programs off the ground we talked about for the kids.”

“Praise the Lord, Father! This is a last minute miracle. How did you do it?”

Father Thomas glanced at the poster on the wall advertising the semi-pro Texas Hold’em Poker Tournament. With a scarlet blush he said, “I found a room full of willing donators.”

“God is great!” Sister Cecelia Maria exclaimed. “I’ll make the call now. Thank you, Father. Thank you so much!”

“You are welcome. And Sister? One other thing. Please call Father Fitzgerald. See if he is available on Sunday to hear my confession.”

~~~

An hour later with the wind at his back, Thomas made his way up the block. He stopped in front of the sleeping homeless man. Retrieving the wallet, Thomas slipped six twenties into the billfold. He shoved the wallet squarely into the man’s trouser pocket. Snapping his arm out straight to reveal the watch, he unstrapped the Rolex from his wrist and dropped it into the man’s stained trench coat pocket. The man stirred and Thomas walked away.

As Thomas rounded the corner, he looked back. The homeless man was sitting up, one hand cupping the top of his head as he stared into his open wallet.

(Word Count = 749, not including the title)

What Time Is It?

The chosen setting of a novel presents to the author hundreds of little description decisions that must be made throughout the plot in order to sell the authenticity of the story. A novel that takes place in 1998, for example, will be very different in many ways than one that takes place in 2008.

Take a look at developments in technology over the past ten years. Since the end of the '90s we've seen Internet usage demographics go from 'just tech-savvy urbanites' to 'everyone and her grandparents.' DVD players have all but replaced VHS. In 1999, most of my music was still on cassette tape. I didn't have time to buy all the CDs I wanted before MP3 music files became the rage. Televisions were still bulky boxes with 32-inch screens sitting atop consoles, and although the technology to stop, rewind, and digitally record live TV has been around for twenty-five years, TiVo didn't become a household word until the middle of the first decade after the Millennium.

I still haven't made a firm decision about the setting of my WIP. The original premise hinges on a random, computer-generated phone call by a telemarketer selling long distance telephone service. I could stick with that premise and set the novel in the early 2000s. If I do, then when the antagonist sets out to hunt down the protagonist with only her first and last name and an area code, I'll have to decide what devices he uses to locate her. The Internet? In 2001 and 2002, a "Google" search wouldn't pull up very much on an ordinary person in her early 20s. Even if you were Feeling Lucky. WhitePages.com? MySpace? Would my reclusive, thirty-something bad guy even have a computer at his house? And on the road, would he know how to find or use an Internet café? I'd have to figure out what other options he would have at his disposal.

Option number two is to move the setting to modern day. To do so, I'd have to tweak the premise. Do we even have telemarketers anymore? I get calls from credit card company affiliates wanting to sell me protection packages against identity theft. Maybe old Ray works for one of those? Does he have a laptop computer to take on the road with him? Does Julie have a FaceBook profile? (I tried to find a "Julie Knotts" on FaceBook, just for the fun of it. There were literally thousands of people who came up.)

At this point, the logic problems to work through seem endless. Clearly, depending on the setting I choose, I have more research ahead of me.

How does technology impact your current story? Do you have to think about it, or is it irrelevant? Do you have to create any technology of your own?