I'm reading a book by Kenneth J. Harvey called The Town That Forgot How to Breathe. Harvey is a juicy writer. His instincts are sharp, and he chooses words that carry a lot of bang for their buck, and which sound good in the company of the other words in their sentence -- and yet, his writing is never self-indulgent verbiage.
For example, from the chapter I read last night:
"The shark rose high in the air as the crane swiveled toward the huge grey plastic container that lay on the back of a flatbed ...Gulls followed faithfully above the suspended shark, gliding weightlessly, as if attached by guide wires."
Swiveled is an action verb of distinct movement, easily invoking the intended imagery. Instead of "truck," Harvey said flatbed, again guiding us to specific mental pictures. And notice the alliteration in the second sentence: gulls/gliding/guide; followed/faithfully; suspended/shark. The [s] sound is further reinforced with consonance: gulls/weightlessly/as/wires. And assonance enhanced the lyrical sound of the sentence with gull/above; faithfully/weightlessly, and gliding/guide/wire.
The more experienced writer I become, the more I think with juicy words during the first draft. However, it's not until the revision stage that I truly turn on the juice, searching out the lushest vocabulary with the highest impact and the poetic devices that will make my words sing.
Do you notice juicy words and poetic devices when you read? Are you conscious about incorporating them when you write?
37 comments:
"Juicy words" is a great way to describe them. Love it!
I love subtle use of writing devices...and a perfect, juicy word choice is up there on the list of things I love. (I'm generally not a fan of alliteration, though, except perhaps in children's books.)
Have a wonderful weekend, my friend. :)
Love,
Lola
Love your terminology!
Isn't it ironic that we are told as writers to avoid words ending in "ly" - and yet in the passage above, there are THREE in one sentence? Go figure!
I'm VERY conscious of picking the right word in my first draft. It's definitely one of my favorite things about writing. :-)
Love this post. I never pick the right word until I'm in revisions then it's me and my trusty thesaurus who battle it out.
It's funny, I just read Stephen King's ON WRITING and he says go with your gut on your word choices. Don't try to be impressive when a saner version of the word will do.
Something to think about.
Love the description. Honestly, I don't notice juicy words. I think that's the beauty of it. What I notice is when it's blah.
I don't tend to notice when I'm reading - I just know if I like the flow or not. However, when writing, I notice every word (even if I don't want to until I hit the revision stage).
Oh yes, definitely! I love juicy words. I just hope to get better and better at it. I can only seem to maintain my juiciness in short pieces. I hope I can manage that through a whole novel one day ...
Don't forget, Housekeeping :o) FULL of major juiciness ...
Great post! This has me thinking. I may bookmark this.
Thanks!
I am in love with so many words that I keep a running list in the back of my journals. BUT, like you, the juicy words will more than likely come in during revisions.
Great post! Juicy words is an awesome term. I love it! I try to juice it up as much as possible. :) Have a fabulous weekend!
Sometimes I'll read and reread and reread again a sentence that moves me just so. Writing really is an artistic craft, and those phrases always have something to teach me.
I notice the big words - does that count?
Great post!
I use the term "dynamic words" to my students and children.
What was wonderful passage you quote. I, too, am drawn to beautiful language. It can be in any book for readers of any age. Go back and read Charlotte's Web, which I believe is at a third-grade reading level.
Speaking of juicy words, "succulent" is pretty cool, plus it sounds just the least bit sexy.
I'm so with you on this one. What I also find, though, is that I don't enjoy stories in which the prose is merely workmanlike on the sentence level. I'm critiquing a MS. like that and I'm not sure what I'll tell the writer. Plenty of non-poetic prose gets published; my love of lushness is somewhat a matter of taste.
Oh, yeah. I love words, and doing interesting things with them. Fortunately, I have one of those minds that remembers fun words and spits them back at me when I want them.
Why say "clear" all the time when a lyrical word like "pellucid" is available?
Why say "red" all the time when "incarnadine" can add a bit of spice?
Would you prefer "arsenal" or "armamentarium?"
And let's not even get started on the lovely foreign-language words that English so easily adopts.
The more words you know, the more interesting will be your writing, I say. Yay words! Yay juicy words!
Great post, good lady. Tres bien fait! Brava! Danke schoen! :)
I love the term "juicy words." I tend to work on my word choice during revision, not my first draft where I'm mostly focused with getting the story down. Thanks for the interesting post and example!
Oh yes, I love using juicy words! So much that one agent told me once my writing was "overwritten" so now I make sure not to overdo on them.
I love anything juicy. ;)
I love reading a book where the words just flow and give you a visual without having to work for it.
Juicy words - what a great way of describing them. I try to use them as much as I can in the first draft, without worrying about it. It's the second, third, fourth, etc, where the juice gets turned on.
I love making music with words. Crafting meaning from the sound, not of each letter, but from the combinations of words in the sentence.
Cool. Juicy words!!! I like that. Great post.
I love the term: Juicy Words. :)
I try to be very conscious when writing about my words, but sometimes all of those rotten words just come flowing out. :)
Have a great weekend!
That's a very, very beautifully written paragraph. I do notice and appreciate juicy words when I read them, although I'm not very good at incorporating them into my own writing. That's something I'm working hard at.
Juicy words is new for me. I love it. :0)
I always notice juicy words when I'm reading but I don't consciously think of them when I'm writing. I let the characters tell me what words to write. Then when I'm revising I go back and see what came out and try to make it as juicy as possible.
Jai
My first draft is sadly devoid of juicy words...they're still ripening on the vine. I'll harvest them during revisions. ;)
I'm like you...most of my 'juicy words' come out during revisions, but every now and then I slide one in during a first draft. Practice does indeed make perfect. :)
I get so excited by this stuff. When I teach descriptive writing, I bring a "juicy" excerpt to class, and the students look at me as though I've lost my mind when I get excited about the perfect word or metaphor.
I remember growing up with books that had "juicy" words, descriptive language that enriched the reading. Now, as writers, we're told to tighten up the writing-don't use adverbs. Such a shame that "juicy" words are an unusual find.
...juicy words is a cool way of describing the idea of show/not tell.
The passage with the gull is worded in such a way that doesn't just describe what the gull's doing, but literally has the reader hanging from the bird's wings, enjoying the ride.
Great post:)
The teachers at my chidrens' school use the same term, and I've often thought of doing a blog post with this very title. Yes, I do try to incorporate "juicy" words in my writing, and I notice them in other writing as well.
I love books with juicy language, and it's proof that you can still write beautifully without sounding like a snooty prick. And I try to write juicily too, because it's fun and I want my writing to be unique. :)
Love that--juicy words. I do notice, and in fact, when prose is really plain, it makes it hard for me to read. The poetry of the words is as beautiful to me as the story. But as a writer, like you I tend to get juicier in later drafts.
Great post! I like the term juicy words. Sounds like I'll have to add this book to my TBR pile, too.
Hope you are doing well!
Have a wonderful weekend, my friend
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